Afraid to Sleep

After cuddling together on the sofa for awhile, Aidan and I headed upstairs to our room. No one can have any comprehension of what that phrase makes me feel like even now ... OUR ROOM. It's really mind-blowing to go from almost seven months apart, having never lived in the same state let alone the same house, to flying 3000 miles to Aidan's birth country and sharing a home. I can imagine for some, the idea of this dynamic could be awkward, to say the least -- I have been asked a hundred times how on earth Aidan and I could have fallen so hard for one another in love with the majority of our time together being over Skype -- and on top of that, how in the world could we just move in together (even temporarily)?? Wouldn't that feel the least bit... odd? No. Not at all. That's just part of the beauty of what we share together. I can say with utmost certainty that walking into this house with Aidan and sharing every morning, noon, and night with him has been nothing short of natural for me. We have grown so close over the last several months, sharing everything in our conversations, that being together like this is just ... RIGHT. It's just exactly what needed to be.

SO... back to the story. We went upstairs and got ready for bed, and we checked on Jillian who was sound asleep. I don't remember what time it was, probably nearing midnight -- and the sky was still light. Here it stays light outside very late and the sun is up by 4am -- it's really a shock for my brain! I was truly exhausted, both mentally and physically. Not only the five hour time change pushing me into jet lag, but the excitement of the journey, the constant watchful eye (even sleeping on the plane) over my daughter making sure she was never out of my sight through all this travel, and then the adventure of meeting so many new people -- and hearing this beloved Irish accent and dozens of new words and phrases, sending my mind into partial translation mode -- wore me out. Don't get me wrong --- all of it was a "good" tired, if you know what I mean. I was overcome with happiness, but needed sleep. By the time Aidan and I finally bid each other 'sweet dreams' and I heard him lulling off in slumber, I lay there awake with heavy eyes, exhausted, but almost afraid to close them. Was I dreaming? Would I still be here in the morning? More importantly -- would Aidan still be beside me when the sun came up?

It was almost like a movie. I felt as if I had traveled through time or space or into some third dimension. Only days before I was washing dishes in my own kitchen, running errands in Michigan, pouring over college books, and staring at my true love on my iPhone screen --- and now, I was laying next to him at midnight in Ireland. Images of the day rolled in my mind like a film in slow rewind. The green hills, the bleating sheep, the delightful cadence in the way the Irish speak, the way Aidan's family welcomed Jillian and I with open arms and open hearts, and even the little differences I was already noticing between my daily life back home and life here. As much as I needed sleep, I found myself laying there just digesting everything  that had just happened.

Speaking of differences ... I had tried to prepare myself for different facets of Irish life before I came; I read about the cuisine, the landscape, and I watched over 100 hours of documentaries pertaining to the unique (and often troubled) Irish history. I even read blogs of Americans living here in Ireland, watched Irish comedians on YouTube, and scanned lists of common Irish cuss words and what they mean (even though I'm not one to use them -- it must be known that the F word is way more commonly spoken here than at home, for example!) Call me a nerd, or an obsessive researcher -- most of it was a combination of curiosity and trying to kill time over seven months without my boyfriend. But there are many things here that I had no preparation for, which left me with delightful surprise - or confusion, as it may be. For example, I had already found myself in a dark bathroom not knowing how to turn on a light. That was funny. Feeling the walls for a switch in the dark got me no where. I soon learned that the light in the bathroom is controlled by a string hanging down near the door. Pull the string, and the light in the middle of the ceiling comes on. Huh -- who knew? I also found out that it takes more than a gentle push to flush a toilet here on the Emerald Isle (and I know now that my new Irish friends and family will be laughing, but hey -- come along and walk in my shoes for a bit and enjoy the fun!) Jillian and I even had a private conversation about giving the toilet a good muscle push to make it work. I haven't yet seen a combined hot/cold faucet -- the hot and cold water are controlled separately. (Not that we don't have that in the States -- we do -- but combination faucets are seen more often than the separate faucets.) And even though I was prepared for the outlets, having purchased six plug adapters -- I found out the hard way that you can't just plug something in and walk away: I plugged in my phone to charge it and came back sometime later only to find it hadn't charged at all -- there are tiny on/off switches for every outlet. Plug something in, turn the switch 'on' and voilá -- you have electric -- or as the Irish say, "NOW you're suckin' diesel!' And the tea. OH the tea. Even on my first day, I lost count of how many cups of tea I had. And I already liked it! Truthfully, I was afraid I wouldn't take to it well -- I'm a coffee drinker through and through. But by the second cup, it already tasted good to me (granted, my tea gets milk and sugar.) And do you know, every time you drink tea, you get biscuits? EVERY time. Not biscuits like we know them to be, though -- (the flaky, round dough-based bread kind that are baked and then eaten with butter or jam or sausage gravy) -- Biscuits here, are sweets. Chocolate and wafers, kind of reminiscent of Twix bars, cookies, cakes, cupcakes, marshmallow and chocolate, caramel and chocolate, oh the list goes on. The first time Jillian was offered a biscuit she declined-- until she saw other people eating the chocolate goodness. Jillian comes running now if you mention biscuits. So imagine -- tea several times a day and also every time you go to someone else's home -- there are biscuits. God help my hips during these seven weeks, from growing. Gotta get out there and walk it off on these Irish hills!! Oh but just delicious. My Lord. I'm loving tea and biscuits.

And so my mind continued to wander through all of these visions, while I lay there in the dark. I tried so hard to shut it off for the moment in order to get some rest -- after all, the very next day was the wedding -- the IRISH wedding, sure to be a very long and exciting event! I rolled over and watched my sweetheart sleeping, reached over and touched his brow and his hair and stared long and longingly at him, thanking God once more that we were finally together. And once again, I felt my precious Claddagh ring on my finger, felt the butterflies in my stomach, and finally closed my eyes. What a beautiful dream I am living. What a beautiful dream.

Aidan had set the alarm to make sure we were up and at-em on Friday morning for enough time to get ready for the wedding, and to get Jillian ready to go with Sheenagh to her house with Rose and Erin, two of her nieces that are close to Jillian's age. Jillian isn't used to being able to spend so much time with other kids outside of school, because our neighborhood is mostly retired couples, so she is in heaven here! And so... the alarm went off and in my sleepy state I heard Aidan say "Good Morning, Gorgeous!" as he kissed me. I blinked awake ... and happily, realized I was still here in this beautiful country and Aidan was very much still next to me.

After coffee and "soda" (soda farls -- a type of bread, similar to English muffins in texture but prepared in larger, triangle or wedged shapes), it was time for a shower. Now that was about to be an adventure for this American girl.

I gathered what I needed and headed to the bathroom, not surveying my surroundings enough before stripping down. I saw the shower head and out of habit, reached down to turn on the hot and cold water faucets in the tub. But I couldn't find the knob or switch to turn on the shower! Hmmmm. I looked up near the shower head and saw a box with plenty of buttons, but pushing them didn't do anything. OH good grief, I almost have a bachelor's degree in college but I couldn't figure out how to turn on a shower! So I threw my clothes back on and headed down the stairs to find my sweet (and forgiving) Aidan. "Honey, I  can't figure out how to turn on the shower... Can you help me??" I called.  "No bother, love!" he answered, and followed me back up the stairs. Turns out, I hadn't noticed the string hanging near the shower from the ceiling. He showed me that I had to pull the string which turns on the water to the shower. (Well geez, I'm learning something everyday around here!) From there, I had to push the on/off button on this box by the shower head and the water came on. Poor Aidan must think his girlfriend is daft. But at least now I could at least know how to get clean! The other thing I noticed that was different, was the bi-fold type glass door on the side of the tub. I had seen shower doors, sure -- but they closed up the whole space. This door folds up very compact up to the wall at the head of the tub, and unfolds when you need it; it opens up to about the halfway point of the tub length. I loved that didn't take over the space entirely -- when it's put away, it leaves the room feeling quite open, visually. The window in the bathroom is also very large -- and by the way, no screens on the windows. That was new for Jillian. I had gotten used to it in Germany years ago, but she's terrified of bugs getting in. We truly haven't seen but only a couple so far. And the doors and windows have levers, not knobs. Love it. In fact,  I remember thinking about this years ago in Germany, and now I'm thinking about it again -- I'd love to replace all my doorknobs at home with levers.

After the very-refreshing shower, I went back to our room to get ready. I had to dry my hair. Once again, I had come prepared -- I bought a dual-voltage hair dryer so as not to have to need a power converter. But our room didn't have a free outlet -- so I went to Jillian's room to dry my hair. I plugged it into the adapter and into the wall, remembering to flick on the outlet switch (See? I can learn!) I started drying my hair. I quickly noticed that the hair dryer was getting awful hot and smelling funny. Hmmm. I looked down the barrel and saw the heating element fire hot!! Holy crap! I turned it off and smelled smoke. Yikes. What had I done NOW??? After a lot of checking, I realized that the dryer wasn't instantly switched to the other voltage --- I was supposed to turn a little, tiny dial that needed a screwdriver. Well I didn't have one and Aidan was next door, so next best thing? I ran down to the kitchen and found a butter knife, took it upstairs, switched the little dial, and once again, I was "suckin' diesel' and could safely dry my hair, without burning the house down. Good grief.

Back to our room. At home I'm used to getting ready in the bathroom, but here there is a dressing table in the bedroom. There are no outlets in the bathroom for a curling iron nor is there a large mirror or counter space. I was thrilled with the dressing table Aidan provided for me, with angled mirrors and drawers. I plugged in my curling iron after unplugging Aidan's iPhone clock thing (sorry honey) ... and proceeded to get ready for the wedding. Jillian was already off with her new-found friends at Sheenagh's.

I still couldn't get over the beautiful weather, either. Gazing out the window while I did my hair, I soaked in the sun and the breeze. Where is all this famous Irish rain??? I was sure it would be raining everyday! What gorgeous temps too, only in the 60s. Heaven. When we left Michigan, it was in the 90s and humid. I will happily take this kind of weather every single summer, thank you!

If I must say so myself, by the time Aidan and I met up again, both dressed for the wedding, we were quite a handsome couple! MY goodness, that man made my knees weak, in his suit and tie. GORGEOUS. We went next door to see his parents and his aunt before we left, and had photos taken. I was walking on clouds!! This was so exciting for me!! Being on the arm of my gorgeous sweetheart and heading to a real, Irish wedding!! Pinch me!!

St. Malachy's in Kilcoo

Aidan's brother dropped us off at the church, which was a gorgeous building in itself, in a town called Kilcoo. People were gathering and heading in to find a seat. Aidan began to introduce me to a few friends and once again, it was as if we were long lost friends -- they are just so friendly! We walked into the beautiful church and found a seat. I swear I was dizzy with excitement. I glanced around at the women, some wearing the famous hats. Aidan whispered to me what to expect as far as standing, sitting, kneeling, and the readings. Before long the ceremony began with a woman singing Amazing Grace up in the balcony, and the bridesmaids walking down the aisle. They all walked very quickly, surprisingly, and before that song was over, the bride, too, had already made her way to the alter. Gorgeous couple, too!! The ceremony was delightful and I enjoyed the message from the priest. We exited the church afterward, and met up with another couple, riding with them to the next stop -- tea and sandwiches at a pub/restaurant. This was something new for me -- this was not the reception, but a snack time before going to the reception! It was LOVELY. After chatting with friends, we jumped back in the car once again and headed for a drive with breathtaking scenery to the reception, which was held across from a beautiful bay surrounded by green Irish hills. We entered a garden area with small tables and chairs outside for drinks and visiting. During this time, the bridal party was away getting photos elsewhere. After awhile, we were asked to enter the dining room, and we found our names on a table list and discovered we were sitting at table 1. It doesn't matter whether Aidan knows people near him or not -- he's instantly chatting and after two minutes finding out that they know the same people somehow. I love to watch Aidan in conversation.

The bridal party entered and sat at the front of the hall, with the bride and groom seated in very tall back, velvet chairs that resembled royalty. What followed was a multi-course delectable dinner, served to each guest by the hotel staff. After this delicious (and VERY filling) dinner, I began to fall fast. Aidan got me coffee, which helped, but I think the jet lag in this moment was really getting to me. Not only were my eyes very sleepy but my anxiety kicked in, I'm not sure why -- and I did my best to cover up the worsening panic attack. Between coffee, cold water, and meds, it was soon over and I began to feel more like myself. The staff at the completion of dinner, asked the guests to move back to the bar or the garden so they could prepare the room for the music and dancing. Aidan and I took a walk near the water that was just so beautiful and romantic. I just love being with him, feeling his arm around me and being able to look up at those gorgeous blue eyes of his.

Whistledown Hotel - Warrenpoint

By the time we returned to the dining room, it had been turned into a dance. Tables and chairs surrounded the center dance floor. We sat with several of Aidan's old schoolmates, and what an enjoyable time we shared with them! I was so grateful they were as welcoming to me as they were -- after all I didn't share any history with them at all, but they happily included me in conversation and laughs. What wonderful people!!! And the dancing --- OH the dancing. Before Aidan and I even had a chance to dance, one of his friends came to me and whisked me off to the dance floor. What a hoot!! I had a ball. And for the rest of the night, Aidan and I danced together, fast songs, slow songs, 80s songs, yelling out familiar lyrics at deafening levels with the rest of the crowd -- what a blast!! I LOVE to dance -- and being able to share that with the man I love was HEAVEN!!!

Carlingford Lough - Warrenpoint

We took another walk outside for air and came back in to discover a table set up in the middle of the dance floor full of sandwiches and sausages. Really?? More food?? I was stunned. I'd never seen this at a wedding!! Sure enough -- it was another tasty bunch of foods, and after a bit it was all cleared up and the lights dimmed again for more dancing. OH the dancing. As tired as I was, I didn't want it to end!! We were having so much fun. As it went though, the party wound down early (for Irish standards) at 12:30a-1a. And the sky outside was still fairly light! Crazy! We rode home with a couple of Aidan's friends, such fun conversation. We came home and crashed fast. What a night!! Fabulous experience to attend an Irish wedding and reception and fall fast asleep with my sweetheart.

I am so thankful for this time here in Ireland and with Aidan ... and I know Jillian continues to have amazing times, as well. Every morning I wake up and think, "OH thank God, I'm still here!!" I really feel like every single day is a dream. A happy, loving dream that I never want to wake from. <3